Sunday, January 2, 2011

Love My Own Bed

We are home!!!!  It is so Awesome!!!  I slept so good, I just love my bed so much!!

I keep thinking I am forgetting something, keep looking around for what I am missing - except I can't find her here.  She is not here like she should be.  She is still there!!!  I love being home, I love being with our kids, I love the comfort of being in the states - but I HATE that we left her behind.  

I am forever changed - I will never be the same person I was before December 20th. I can't explain it, I can't find the words.  But I know that I will forever look at everything so different and I will always carry a heavy heart for those beautiful children left to live a life I will never understand.  I will LOVE so much more, I will APPRECIATE everything, I will be forever grateful for my family and friends.  I have read in so many blogs how this journey is life changing - well, they were not kidding.  My Life has changed - YES!!!!  For so many reasons in a better way - Absolutely.  And then the pain - a constant heart ache that I don't think will ever leave - EVER!!!  This heart ache is important, it will be a constant reminder to "DO SOMETHING".  There is no time - so  many things need to change right now!!!!  I know this but I have no idea where to start, I just know I have to do something.  So I will ask that you all PRAY and PRAY HARD Please - Please Pray that a forever family is found as soon as possible for all the waiting children.  So many beautiful children are just waiting to LIVE a life that we all might take for granted.  I know I did - I took my life for granted for sure and I will NOT make that mistake again.  

Thank you so much for following our journey - thank you for all the comments and prayers.  Honestly, I have never felt such strong support in my life.  I felt so safe on our trip home, knowing so many of you were praying for us.  GOD has been so Faithful and so have all of YOU!!!! 



  1. I totally know what you mean! talk about perspective change! Once you guys are home with sweet Belle, we SO have to meet!

    Happy New Year


  2. Although I haven't been commenting, I have been following your journey. And what a bitter sweet journey so far.

    I fully understand the pain of leaving your child behind as I did that twice during the adoption of our oldest daughter. It was truly heart-breaking and the only thing that kept me going was knowing one day I would return to bring her home. Hold on to that for the next few days and I look forward to reading all about your return trip home with Isabelle in your arms forever.

  3. It has been such an honor to follow along on your journey - I can only pray to have one of our own one day. Until then my thoughts and prayers are with you and I can't wait for the post that tells us all she is home where she belongs!

  4. You have learned from your journey to Isabelle Summer. I think that is one of the most important things. This journey is NOT for the faint of heart. Our journeys weren't as difficult as some, but what we have seen, what we have heard, and what we have felt is very much the same. God used our children to open our eyes. It IS important that we don't forget, and that we do what we can to help other families, and other children. Even if we can't help physically, we both know that the prayers of a few are heard by our God, and He will protect those precious little ones that we had to leave behind. Soon you will have your little Belle in your arms again, and home safely and she will bloom even more before your eyes. She will always be a reminder of what God did for you, and for me, and for our families. He blessed us more than some will ever understand. Hang in there, God is good.