Saturday, September 11, 2010

What can I do????

My mind is racing constantly - I can't get it together.  My heart is screaming for me to do something.  I just can't shake it off.   I love a little girl who is in trouble and I can't do a thing to HELP her.  This doesn't make any sense!!   I remind my self constantly by chanting, GOD is GOOD, GOD is GOOD, GOD is GOOD!!  I know this will all  my heart.  Why can't I just calm down then and allow HIM to take over.  This is HIS plan and I know this so why can't I relax just a little bit.  Is GOD telling me to do MORE????  Is this why I am feeling this way???  When I get consumed and obsessed with something that is usually the case, so maybe I am suppose to do something.  What???  I need some help here, what can I do?????

I keep looking at Leeza (2) on the Reece's Rainbow site.  I went back and read a post the Sanchez family posted months ago about Leeza.  I am remembering stories Sarah (Zoya's Mom) told us about Leeza.  Does GOD want me to bring Leeza home too?  Is HE telling me that our sweet Lyla has been given her wings and is with HIM and now we need to look at Leeza?  I remember looking at sweet Leeza in the beginning of this journey  before I found Lyla and I thought I never would be able to care for her properly.   I don't understand all of this and I feel consumed with guilt that I am even looking at another child. 


Yes, I am having a hard time!


I love you Lyla!!!!!

4 comments:

  1. I don't have the right words - I'm so sorry for all that you, your family, and Lyla are going through. Know that our family is praying for you. We pray for Leeza, too.

    JTHTL

    Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. - Deuteronomy 31:6

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  2. I am praying so hard for your family and Lyla, I hope you will hear something soon and it will be that sweet Lyla is on the mend!
    Love to all your family, including your sweet little angel.

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  3. I am so sorry you have to go through this. I am so sorry Lyla has to as well. I know that God does not leave us or forsake us so you can better believe that he and his angels are with her right now holding her and loving on her until you can.

    I hope you hear something soon because I can not even imagine not knowing.

    Lord,

    Though 1000 may fall at Lylas side and 10000 at her right hand, no harm will come to Lyla. (psalm 91) Bring this family peace in the storm. Give them comfort that only you can. Be with Lyla and her doctors and allow them to do all they can and let this be for Your glory. Thank you for the miracles you will bring to this family and to Lyla. In Your name we pray. Amen

    be blessed


    Ashlee

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  4. I don't even know what to say honey. Just hang in there

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